What to Remember About Growing Old

We are collectively getting older as a nation – much older. About one in four people fall into the ‘senior’ category. The number of boomers (born between 1946 and 1964) alive today is approximately 64 million. According to a report“The aging of the baby boomers is causing a dramatic shift in the age composition of the US population.”

In addition, many boomers work much later than expected. Maybe it’s inflation, the rising cost of living, or high debt and poor planning, but more and more people aren’t retiring. I was standing at the Safeway checkout counters yesterday, where there were five checkers working, and four were at least in their late 60s or early 70s.

My wife recently had foot surgery and was given a disabled parking permit for a few months. Have you recently tried to find a free disabled parking space? Good luck. And the last time I went for a walk in the park, it felt a bit like a senior citizens’ parade. Don’t even get me started on how big Costco’s adult diaper section is.

Choose your favorite cliché about growing older and say it out loud. Go ahead; I will wait.

You are as old as you feel. (Or has it fallen?)

Age is just a number. (Your blood pressure is also a number, and it’s not always good.)

You don’t get older; you’re doing better! (Better what? Take a nap? Drive?)

Now slap yourself for being so stupid. We live in a time where we want to believe that 70 is the new 50. That is not true.

But wait a minute. . . don’t run into the woods to die yet or sign up for senilicide (killing old people; you can read about it here).

We may need a change in our attitude toward aging and our elders.

Rather than subjecting our elders to occasional neglect, abandonment, and other forms of abuse, we must learn to appreciate not only what they have done, but also what they can do. still Doing.

We’ve come a long way in our respect for veterans, first responders, and people of color, but the lack of honor for our elders is disturbing. Every now and then I like to take public transport. The last time I did that, I sat as far back as possible to watch the people. People watching may find it creepy to some, but I find it fascinating.

An older woman, probably in her eighties or nineties, boarded the bus. Unfortunately, she was forced to go all the way to the back because no one stood up to offer her a seat. I jumped up to stop her and helped myself into the seat next to me as the bus lurched back into traffic. There were as many as thirty people, all decades younger than her, who didn’t even make eye contact with her, let alone give her a seat in the front.

We talked for about ten minutes to her bus stop. Her name was Ann and she was a teacher in Idaho for over forty years. This wonderful, beautiful and kind woman told me with tears in her eyes, “I just don’t feel like a burden to anyone anymore.” I assured her she was not and thanked her for her incredible influence on hundreds of children. She patted my hand, smiled and said, “If I were younger, I would ask you to marry me!” We both laughed.

What we need to remember about growing older

There is something I call the ‘third journey’. This season in your life is approximately the last third of your journey on planet Earth.

The ‘first journey’ is the decades of your youth where much growth and enormous change take place.

The “second journey” is the decades of your life when you have built a career and an established family. There will be challenges during this part of the journey, but for the most part you will live a life of relative comfort and routine.

The ‘third journey’ refers to the last twenty or thirty years of your life. If you were married with kids, you’re probably an empty nester now (unless your 30s moved back home a while).

The third voyage is a season when some want to set sail, thinking they have paid their dues. They are tired and leave the adventure to the younger generation. This season is also the time when they start to feel that they are afraid of becoming a burden to others.

However, this mentality is a modern perspective in Western culture. Too many people currently view age as a curse and focus on physical limitations rather than the wisdom gained from life’s unmarketable experiences.

I agree with Rob Giannamore: “Our modern society has a strange relationship with aging.”

Instead of seeing those on their third journey as an asset and a blessing, the younger generations sometimes see them as a burden and a bottleneck to their progress.

Instead of drawing on their life experiences and listening to their wisdom, many dismiss those on the third journey as unattainable, outdated, and therefore of little or no value.

To the young people reading this, I encourage you to change your perspective. You may be smart, sharp, and full of energy, but wisdom comes from experience, and you need the wisdom of those who have come before you.

And in the future, when you are on your third journey, you will be glad that you treated others as you would like to be treated.

Here is my challenge to those of you on your third journey:

• Stop worrying about ‘becoming a burden’.
• Turn off the TV. (There’s a reason they used to call it the “idiot box.”)
• Get off your ass.
• Find a place where you can have an impact and make a difference.

Doing not Surrender your potential because someone told you it’s time to be put out to pasture. Doing not give up on your dreams because you think your better days are behind you.

What if the best is yet to come?

• Write a book and leave a legacy for your children and grandchildren.
• Start a new career. Something small and simple is fine.
• Pick up a musical instrument and learn to play it.
• Mentor to a young leader.
• Go back to school and learn something new.

Be both a student and a teacher until your last breath. Keep growing and keep sharing.

Sure, your memory may not be what it once was, and your energy may be diminished, but there is no substitute for what you learned in the trenches of life.

I love Betty Friedan’s quote: “Aging is not a lost youth, but a new phase of opportunity and strength.”

Allow me to use an old cowboy cliché: “Don’t hang up your spurs.”

Not now.

Not yet.

You are still needed.

You still have value (and always will).

“Wisdom belongs to the elderly,

and understanding the elderly” (Job 12:12 NLT).