Mummies, you’ll get there – all on time! Focus on the Family celebrates growth in motherhood – Salt&Light

Due to her battle with polycystic ovarian syndrome, having children has not been easy for Kristen Kiong.

She is now a mother of two girls, ages 2 and 4, and says it fills her with joy to see her daughters grow up.

“In many ways my children are miracles and it is almost astonishing that they are here with us in the flesh,” the 35-year-old said.

But just as motherhood brings many joys, every season also brings its challenges.

“As I go through each stage with my daughters, I find myself thinking, ‘This age is hard,’ only to realize that the next year will be harder,” Kristen admitted.

“From dealing with tantrums and learning to practice patience with the kids to figuring out how to best meet their ever-changing needs, I can’t help but think about what parenting feels like as a cycle of struggle.”

Her struggles are well known, as many mothers will attest.

“In the early days of motherhood, I would impatiently look for the next milestone, seeking the temporary relief between sleep regressions and jumps, trying to avoid discomfort whenever possible,” says Joey Ong, 30.

“While things got better, it would get worse again. It left me disappointed and defeated.”

Now mother of three children She was 1, 3 and 5 years old and said: “When I only had one child, I didn’t realize how hard I was on myself every day. I became my own worst enemy!

“I was turbulent and easily triggered by the smallest setback; a mistake or a bad day would put me back in a negative mood.”

Over time, Joey has learned to be kinder to herself and to recognize that, like her children, she is growing too.

Recognizing that these feelings of discouragement are more common than you might think, Focus on the Family Singapore’s Mother’s Day campaign encourages mothers that their efforts to sow growth in their children will bring growth “All in Good Time”.

Just as a garden needs time and care to blossom, motherhood takes patience and perseverance to grow into something beautiful.

Launched on May 3, heartfelt stories like Kristen’s and Joey’s can be found at www.family.org.sg/AllinGoodTime to remind mothers that they are not alone.

Vicky Ho, COO of Focus on the Family Singapore, explained the gist behind this year’s campaign, reassuring mothers that God is doing a good work in their lives and their families – even if they can’t see it yet.

“As with all aspects of life, God has a time and season for everything in motherhood,” she said.

“There will be long seasons of hard work with barely any visible growth, moments of joy and relief at seeing glimpses of change and progress, and painful but necessary seasons of refinement.”

Mothers can take refuge in the knowledge that “He makes all things beautiful in their time,” Vicky added.

As part of the campaign, Focus on the Family has prepared uplifting digital content for mothers discover the ways in which they can trust the process of motherhood.

Spouses, children, or anyone looking to encourage a mother can also send them a Timeless Bouquet, filled with affirming statements that can be customized.

Finally, if you’re on Instagram, Focus on the Family has also created a special filter that lets you share a photo with a mom so you can celebrate how you’ve watched her grow.

Learning through motherhood

Sometimes it takes years for fruit to appear. But even while waiting, Kristen and Joey opened up about the ways they’ve seen themselves grow through the motherhood process.

“I am constantly learning to appropriately relinquish control over my children because they are people and not robots,” says Kristen.

“When it comes to raising children, it’s not about following a manual or formula to ‘get things working.’ They are people with unique personalities and emotions.”

Motherhood is a journey of constantly learning – about your children, yourself and what works for your family – and then adapting, Kristen points out.

Kristen shared that through the journey of motherhood, she has learned to live with margins instead of filling her day to the brim.

“For example, I am someone who likes to do things quickly and I am used to a busy schedule. I’ve come to realize that kids don’t do well with busy schedules, so I started going out with them without an agenda, and just following them wherever they wanted to go.

“That turned out to be something fun for me too!”

She revealed that motherhood has also forced her to deepen her trust in God, saying, “There were nights when (my daughters) were screaming, and I didn’t know what to do and just prayed helplessly for them.

“I don’t know what ‘good’ parenting is – am I raising my children well? And maybe the answer is that you really have to trust that God will take care of that.”

Kristen affirmed that God’s timing is perfect in motherhood and said that as she waited for growth, she would continue to commit to “kingdom habits,” such as taking the children to church faithfully from an early age.

“I only see the beginnings of fruit as they pray for each other or dance to worship songs.

“But I’ve heard from other, more experienced parents who have seen their children go to altar calls and take their own steps of faith. That’s exciting too!”

Growth takes time

Joey also shared the valuable lessons she has learned along the way as a mother of three.

For example, she has learned to be kinder and gentler to herself while keeping her inner voice in check.

“As we weather the many storms of parenthood, the last thing we need is a spirit of discouragement and defeat. I’m learning to trust and enjoy the process, even if things aren’t ‘better’ yet,” Joey mused.

“Discomfort is a good teacher. Make it a learning opportunity instead of avoiding it. What does my discomfort teach me?”

Joey with her first two children and her mother, who she also credits with showing her what it means to persevere through life’s storms.

Although motherhood is humbling, Joey enjoys knowing that God has more to teach and show her through this parenting journey.

“We are all works in progress, and God is not done with us yet!” she said.

“Only in difficult times can our test become a testimony, and through the pruning that God does, we will ultimately bear fruit.”